


all you want is to remember when all I want is to forget

by TheChildOfDreams



Category: Kagerou Project, Mekakucity Actors
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-04
Updated: 2020-01-04
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:55:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22111444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheChildOfDreams/pseuds/TheChildOfDreams
Summary: Shintaro remembers. Him and Ene have a chat.
Relationships: Enomoto Takane | Ene & Kisaragi Shintaro
Comments: 8
Kudos: 26





	all you want is to remember when all I want is to forget

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is dedicated to my lovely server, bless their hearts from listening to me yell about these two for hours on end. This is honestly only being posted cause of discords character limit so please excuse any errors cause its 1 am and i cant be bothered to go through and fix them

"Ene." Shintaro's voice pierced through the silence that had encompassed his room for the past hour, unmoving from where he sat on the bed. He had his back to her, hunched over something in his lap. It wasn't an unusual scene. In fact, this was how Ene usually saw him.

It was pitiful.

"Yeees Master?~" She chirped regardless, keeping a mischievous smile on her face as she attempted to peer over his shoulder from the computer screen. "What is it? Have you decided to stop being a huge downer and actually hold a conversation with me?"

She was trying to riled him up, but it didn't seem to work, seeing as instead of answering her questions he shot back one of his own.

"Do you remember?"

The question took her aback, startling her enough that her eyes went wide, but she tried to play it off. "Whatever do you mean?~" she sang, turning away from his back to try and get this feeling that he could we right through her to go away. "You're gonna hafta be more specific then that, you know!"

The room went silent. It stayed that way for a while, the cyber girl's anxiety growing with every minute her companion was unresponsive. At some point she'd gotten the temptation to look back to him, but the fear of what she'd find held her back.

When he finally spoke back up, Shintaro's voice was hollow. "Your life before you died. Do you remember?" He asked, each word cutting into Ene like a knife, only filling her with more dread.

Ever the actor, however, she kept her voice light.

Playful.

"I have no idea what prompted you to spew crazy shit like that, Master~ After all, you've said it yourself! I'm a virus! Theres no way for me to 'have a life before this', or whatever nonsense you've thought up~" she laughed, trying her hardest to keep composure while ignoring the feeling creeping around her artificial heart.

When he went silent again, she'd thought she'd won.

Unfortunately for Ene, Shintaro spoke back up.

"You know what I'm talking about, Ene." His words were sharp this time, borderline stern. "Don't fuck around."

"I'm not the one fucking around, Master~" Ene snarked back, crossing her arms despite the fact they both had their backs to eachother therefor he couldn't see her. "You're the one saying all this bullshit!"

"Takane!" He snapped, banging the bed with his hand for emphasis, "Just tell me!"

The moment he had said her name- her _real_ name- Ene's mischievous character had broken. Her eyes had gone wide, arms tighting around herself in an attempt of comfort as her "breathing" picked up.

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Before now, Shintaro hadn't shown any signs of remembering Ayano, much less her. What had changed? Why did he suddenly know the name of a girl that's been dead for a year and a half?

Why could he suddenly remember who she was?

Shaking her head, Ene's fists clenched. "Shut up." She snapped, tone as sharp as his as she started to shake, desperately trying to deny the girl she used to be. The girl that, ironically, acted just as she was now.

"No." Shintaro was stubborn, however, pressing on despite the drastic change in tone. "I need to know. Do you-"

"I said SHUT UP!" The monitor shook, sparking a little as the screen glitched from the power of her scream. Her voice was full of anger and fear, but also a deep sadness as she spoke her next words. "Enomoto Takane is dead. Nothing will change that. Just drop it Shintaro."

"You do remember." Shintaro simply responded, ignoring her request. "You remember all of it, don't you?"

"This talk is gold, coming from you." Ene spat back, his words filling her with a familiar anger. "After all, you repressed entire friendships for what, a year and a half? How pathetic."

"Would you be still say that if I were Haruka?" He tested, tone condescending, like he knew something she didn't. And Ohoho, was that a line he shouldn't've crossed.

"Don't you _dare_ fucking bring him into this. You don't deserve to even think about him after how shitty of a friend you were." Ene snarled, nails biting into her skin as she shook with rage.

"I'm the shitty friend?" Shintaro let out a sharp, disbelieving laugh. "You're the one that pretended he never even existed just because I didn't remember!"

"It was for your own good!" She defended, tone shifting into something more desperate as she tried to lie to herself, and him.

"Was it? Was it for me, Takane?" He asked, voice cruel as he forced what was left of his best friends to face the facts she tried to avoid. "Or was it because _you_ couldn't face the reality that the boy you love is dead?"

As he spoke, Ene brought her hands to her headphones in an attempt to block him out. "Shut up!"

"No!" Shintaro _yelled,_ tone sounding more alive and _angry_ then it had in months. "You let me suffer for _months_ without my memories, all because you couldn't cope with your stupid crush!"

"Shut up shut up shut up!" She wailed back, curling up as her hands pressed harder. "I just wanted us to be happy!"

He'd clearly gotten up at some point of their screamfest, because he slams his hands on the desk. "How was that supposed to make us happy?! I was miserable!" She could feel his glare on her back as the anger from earlier rised up again.

Whipping around, angry tears welled up in Ene's eyes as she fixed his hateful red eyes with a glare of her own. "I WAS MISERABLE TOO!" She screamed at him, shaking. "Do you _think_ I _wanted_ to remember? Remember how it was my fault we died? How I could've stopped it if i had just kept a fucking eye on him?"

Shintaro's expression started to soften, his mouth opening to say something before she cut him off.

"No! I lived every fucking day trying to help _you,_ unable to forget how much it hurt! So sure, when I found out you couldn't remember shit, I thought that maybe leaving you like that would be better! Maybe you'd be able to move on! Be _happy,_ because god knows I'm sure fucking not!" The words spilled from her mouth, coated rage and anguish, leaving her heaving as she stared her final friend down.

Waiting for a response.

And, to put it lightly, Shintaro was shocked. He didn't even realize she'd been upset. Either she was such a good actor, or buried her feelings way down, because in the year and a half they'd shared, she didn't even make a notion that something was wrong. Which was why when he remembered all of it, he'd gotten so angry. He thought she honestly didn't care. And learning that she'd been in pain the whole time, well, it stunned him silent.

It took him a few minutes to think over what next to say, and by then, she'd turned her head in embarrassment.

Opening his mouth back up, he averted his eyes to the desk. "Takane, I'm sorry." He said, all the anger gone from his voice.

That made her snap her head back towards him in surprise. "What?"

"I'm sorry. I... I didn't realize. We're friends, but I didn't even consider that you could've been hurting too and got angry." Shintaro sighed, closing his eyes as he spoke in a weary tone.

Ene was quiet for a long while. But, when she did speak up, voice small and shaky, her tone was one of teasing. "You're not too good at that."

Shintaro looked up, blinking. "What?"

"The whole considering your friends feelings thing." Ene clarified with a little laugh. It just continued as he stared at her, startled. "I was teasing you, stupid. Trying to lighten the mood, ya'know?" She said when he simply continued to stare in shock.

"No no, I know- It's just- You're not angry? I thought for sure I'd run you off with that talk."

"Oh, I'm angry." She confirms, nodding her head with a weak smirk. "But I'm also tired. I kinda want to keep my last living friend, you know? And besides, we both know you'd rot away here if it weren't for me."

That brought a laugh out of him. "Yea, you have a point there." Then he went quiet for a moment, lips pursed as he debated speaking again. He ended up deciding to ask, however, knowing that it would bother him until he did. "So... We're still friends?"

Blinking, Ene simply gave him a small, almost uncharacteristically fond smile. "Yea. We are."


End file.
